is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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