Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize