at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
She told me I should be a condom model.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
