How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
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