Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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