I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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