This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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