I'm lost and stupid without you.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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