let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
