I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
We're not piercing ourselves today.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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