You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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