Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
