and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
