If i come over, it means nothing
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize