I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
