some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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