Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
