Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?

  (269): View more from Michigan

  Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans? (269): Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass. http://tfl.nu/u35z
  Replies (13) Good night (2380) Bad night (666)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (985): There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him. http://tfl.nu/jf24
  Replies (48) Good night (694) Bad night (3718)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Sharpest. Poop. Ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (902): Sharpest. Poop. Ever. http://tfl.nu/efzq
  Replies (39) Good night (1021) Bad night (7851)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie http://tfl.nu/7ez3
  Replies (14) Good night (1866) Bad night (3816)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot. http://tfl.nu/icc0
  Replies (7) Good night (3134) Bad night (1097)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover. http://tfl.nu/w5jl
  Replies (5) Good night (4157) Bad night (1309)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back. http://tfl.nu/936t
  Replies (14) Good night (1255) Bad night (2356)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process. http://tfl.nu/0h10
  Replies (5) Good night (1723) Bad night (1123)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.." http://tfl.nu/dapq
  Replies (10) Good night (2556) Bad night (1291)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed http://tfl.nu/01ok
  Replies (22) Good night (1882) Bad night (916)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS http://tfl.nu/hivl
  Replies (4) Good night (1214) Bad night (455)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola. http://tfl.nu/27bk
  Replies (3) Good night (451) Bad night (2176)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table. http://tfl.nu/a0uv
  Replies (1) Good night (630) Bad night (290)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car." http://tfl.nu/xfdu
  Replies (5) Good night (516) Bad night (737)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude. http://tfl.nu/8jyj
  Replies (0) Good night (583) Bad night (168)

Randomize