no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
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