Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
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