hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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