I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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