White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
