Yo dont text me then not text me
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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