My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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