so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
