I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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