woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Randomize
