I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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