using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
