Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
