Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
