So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
