I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
