Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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