the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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