I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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