If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
