i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
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