North Korea, Best Korea!
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
