At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
