Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Is Oprah even human
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
