The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
