Just fell off a train. Bad.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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