And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
