Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Randomize