no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Do you have feelings for this penis?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
