brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
