im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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