Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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