Will you blow on my dice?
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize
